


Built for Sin

by ParadiseAvenger



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Rape Recovery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-25
Updated: 2013-06-11
Packaged: 2017-12-12 23:33:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/817341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ParadiseAvenger/pseuds/ParadiseAvenger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He still felt their hands on him... He still felt the pain of their violation... He still saw their faces in his nightmares... Though a demon had rescued the poor child, it still didn't end. Plagued with nightmares, Ciel asks Sebastian to do the unthinkable: to help him learn to be touched again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Beginning of the End

Here’s a sad fact—if a woman was sexually assaulted in the Victorian era, she was often considered a nymphomaniac and therefore scorned. Sometimes, they would even be admitted to an asylum and have their genitals mutilated to remove the “desire” for the assault. Could you imagine?

X X X

Ciel Phantomhive didn’t know what made him think it could all just go back to normal after that never-ending month of hell. Maybe it was the last shred of childhood innocence left in his heart because surely that was something only a child would believe—it was over. He had survived. He had been saved. He had killed his tormentors so they could never hurt him again. He came home and rebuilt the manor. He hired servants and moved on with his life and his revenge. It was over, right?

But it wasn’t. Maybe it never would be.

Ciel became very aware of just how not over it was when his aunt, Angelina, learned that he had somehow survived the fire that destroyed his home. She didn’t know the extent of what had happened to him and when she laid eyes on him, she embraced him tightly as aunts were often prone to do. She was crying and she smelled of crushed roses and fresh air. It should have been a comfort to him to be gently held after such a long eternity of being hurt, but… it wasn’t. 

And it was then—wrapped in the arms he had once loved, an embrace that would never harm him—that he screamed in abject terror.

The arms of his precious aunt faded from his mind and he was instead circled by masked faces leering at him cruelly. Her softly-gloved hands melted away into the rough hands of his tormentors, pawing his raw aching skin that had never been touched. Though birds were singing, all he could suddenly hear was the whine of the metal as it was heated to brand him. The scent of roses and Sebastian’s freshly-made sweets faded until all he could smell was blood and death.

All at once, it was as if he had never been saved. It was as if he was still there in that terrible place.

Who was screaming? One of the other brutalized children? But no… they were all already dead. Then, that poor pathetic voice must have been his. God, he was screaming so loudly that something in his throat must have broken from the exertion.

“Young master.” Sebastian’s voice seemed to come from a long ways off, seeping in through the darkness. “It’s alright. You’re safe now.”

“S-Sebastian,” he breathed out and stretched out a hand to his butler. 

Sebastian allowed Ciel to grip his fingers for a moment before sliding them away. After all, Angelina was still standing there, watching them with a stricken look on her face. If her own nephew screamed in her gentle embrace, she wouldn’t want to see him fall eagerly into the arms of a lowly butler.

“My young master is tired and has much to recover from,” Sebastian said smoothly. “Perhaps it would be best to visit another time.”

“Ciel,” Angelina breathed out. “Why…?”

But Ciel didn’t answer. His shoulders were shaking, his one visible eye far-seeing as if still trapped within a nightmare.

“This way please, Madam,” Sebastian murmured and led the distraught red-dressed woman from the foyer where she had embraced Ciel. He gave her a cup of tea spiked with brandy to settle her nerves before ushering her into her waiting carriage.

“W-what happened to him? Why did he scream?” Angelina whispered softly, not to Sebastian though. Maybe she was talking to the God that had allowed her nephew to be tormented so. If that was the case, Sebastian did not intend to dignify such questions with an answer of his own. God had abandoned Ciel, but the demon had answered the boy’s cries. Ciel was Sebastian’s now, more so even than his aunt’s.

Now, Sebastian instead spoke to her coachman and watched the carriage make its way down the repaired drive. Once he was certain they would not be returning anytime soon, he went back into the manor and hurried to Ciel’s side.

The boy was still in the same place though he had slumped to his knees, arms wrapped tightly around himself as he trembled. “Why?” he whispered brokenly. “It was Aunt Ann… She wasn’t going to hurt me so why did those memories…?”

Sebastian gently touched Ciel’s back. “Young master,” he said quietly.

Ciel turned to look at his butler. The boy’s face was chalky-pale, his blue eye wide and red-rimmed, and the smooth bandages covering his other eye made him look more the victim than he already was. His hair shadowed his face, mouth hanging open to suck in desperate breaths of ragged air. “Sebastian,” he whimpered, very much a child. “Why? Why did that happen?”

Sebastian’s voice was crisp and sensible. “Things like that are not so easily recovered from, young master. They will not go away simply because I removed you from their clutches.”

Ciel hugged himself tightly, tears burning in his eyes. Even when he was safe, it still wasn’t over. That realization was enough to chip into his already broken heart. How long would he suffer before an ounce of normalcy returned to his life? Or would he be trapped in this hellish limbo, terribly scared and emotionally fragile, forever?

“A bath,” Sebastian continued, “would be nice now, wouldn’t it, young master?”

Ciel didn’t answer. He remained crumpled on the floor, shivering, with his hands wrapped over his thin shoulders.

Sebastian sighed. He was, after all, first and foremost a demon. He was frustrated with Ciel’s lapses in and out of despair and post-traumatic shock. He was tired of stopping his duties to sooth the child from a nightmare or change the wet sheets on the bed or coddle the boy into a warm bath. But… even a demon could admit that Ciel had been through a terrible ordeal and it was to be expected that he would suffer so severely. It wasn’t as if he could grudge Ciel for his pain. Not many adults could have survived what that child went through, but Ciel had lived and his soul would be delicious when Sebastian finally reached the end of their contract and devoured the child. So, for now, Sebastian acted kindly and took tender care of the badly-damaged boy.

…

_Rough fingers tangled in his dark hair, catching each knot and ripping back painfully. The grip on his hair only served to pull his head back at a sharper angle, thick girth of the cock sliding deeper into his throat and gagging him. His nose was pressed into sweaty pubic hair, thick with the scent of all the other poor boys that had been raped earlier. He would have thrown up if not for the obstruction in his throat, pouring scalding semen into his empty stomach before finally pulling out._

_Ciel gasped in a breath, but his relief lasted only seconds before another cock was forced into his mouth and the painful thrusting was resumed. His lower body was twisted and turned, trying to allow for better angles and more painful penetration. A harsh thrust, hips slapped into his bruised buttocks, and he felt a small cascade of spent semen and blood pour down his thighs. Whimpering, Ciel gripped the thighs of his nearest violator, digging in his nails—not for retribution, but just because he needed to anchor himself to this world._

_“Taking so much,” murmured the man pounding into his small body from behind._

_“Indeed,” another groaned and hot semen filled Ciel’s mouth, choking him until he managed to swallow. “Good boy, drinking it all up.”_

_“His body was built for sin,” a woman purred and her sharp red-lacquered nails pinched his nipples painfully._

_The cock was finally removed from Ciel’s mouth, limp and satisfied—for now—and he gasped in a few greedy breaths. He waited a few moments for another to be rammed down his throat, but when it didn’t come immediately, he dared to speak._

_“P-please,” he begged his violators, words slurred by the searing pain in his ravaged throat. “P-please, s-stop. J-just l-let m-me g-go.”_

_Like a flock of cackling crows feasting on a corpse, they laughed at the poor child spread beneath them. His pale skin was smeared with blood and bruises and semen, the corners of his mouth were raw from being forced so widely open, his small ass was torn and bleeding, and his face was streaked with an endless flow of tears. He made a pretty picture, so close to the black pit of despair, so close to death, so abused and broken and used. Those beautiful blue eyes pleaded with his rapists, but they had no care for him._

_“P-please, n-no m-more,” he begged them._

_The grip on his hair tightened, yanking painfully before the grasp was exchanged, and the woman straddled his face. She smell of her dripping sex made Ciel sick to his stomach, but she didn’t care. None of them cared how he felt or if they tore his intimate places to pieces in their search for pleasure and something else he didn’t understand._

_“N-no,” he whimpered. “P-please, n-no, n-no m-more.”_

_“Lick me,” the woman hissed, gouging into his scalp with her sharp nails as she pulled his hair. “Do it, you little sinful slut.”_

_And Ciel had no choice. He squeezed his eyes closed, tears slipping beneath his clenched lids. He opened his mouth, tongue peeking timidly from its shelter to touch her core. She was finished waiting and yanked his face forward into her wet folds. For a moment, he couldn’t breathe and feared he would be smothered by this woman’s sex, but she shifted her weight and his nose was free of her. He breathed in sharply through his nose, but it only meant he had to smell her._

_“I’m not going to tell you again, whore,” she snarled. “Lick me.”_

_Ciel delved in, trying to pretend he was dining on a delicacy he very much missed and would probably never taste again. He imagined rich whipped cream and strawberries, shortcake and frosting. But decay crept into his protective vision with each stab of pain that his violators carved into him. A man was pounding into his body, this woman tasted terrible, and painful hands crept all over his raw flesh. Before long, the sweet illusion had vanished completely and Ciel sobbed brokenly as he licked the woman’s folds._

_She screamed out the name of God when she came._

_‘Please,’ Ciel begged silently. God had not answered his prayers yet, but he had to be listening somewhere—he just had to. Eventually, Ciel would be saved, right? God would come to save him, right? ‘Please, help me. Please, save me.’_

_But his only answer was the woman stepping off of him, releasing his hair so that his head cracked painfully into the concrete floor, and a man sliding into her place. Another cock forced its way into his mouth, thrusting against the ragged walls of his throat, but at least Ciel didn’t have to give this horrible man pleasure like he had the woman. All he had to do way take it and try not to be sick. It was easier that way, even if it hurt so much more._

_The cock inside him quivered and spilled, scalding salt burning his tattered insides. He nearly sobbed when the man pulled out of him, his ruined muscles spasming after being stretched open for so long. Then, fingers were probing inside him, pulling his muscles open._

_“He’s pretty loose now,” a man said. “And so slippery with all this cum.”_

_“Try it,” the woman said, a sneer in her voice. She wanted to see Ciel hurt. She wanted to hear him scream. “His pathetic little body is built for sin.”_

_The man in his mouth finished, but he pulled out without forcing Ciel to swallow. Gagging and choking, Ciel turned his head to the side as he retched. It was all semen and blood and Ciel was nearly ill again, but managed to force the violent whirl of nausea back. It was worse if he was sick—it just made them beat him for wasting what they ‘so generously gave him.’_

_Suddenly, his body was pulled upright from its sprawled position and he weakly braced himself against a man’s broad chest. His arms trembled, his nails digging in. He felt the cock beneath him like a pole and it slowly forced its way inside his body. He whimpered, the new angle going deeper than before. The man thrust a few times, almost experimentally, and Ciel opened his mouth to beg, but he was cut off by the feeling of a second man pressing against his back. His heart skipped a beat, terror devouring his heart._

_“N-no,” he begged. “No, please!”_

_The woman laughed. “Enjoy it, sinful whore.”_

_“No! Please, don’t! No!” Ciel screamed, his voice rising in terror._

_He thrashed in the men’s combined grasp, but he would never escape them unless his silent God intervened. The second cock pressed insistently against his torn entrance, spreading him wide. He had no doubt that they would force his tiny body to take both of them at once, even if it ripped him in half. They would destroy him before they would show any mercy. Ciel’s stomach muscles weakened with fear, his bladder quivering in horror and agony._

_“Please, no! My body can’t take two! I’ll be torn apart! Please, don’t! Stop! No!”_

_But they didn’t stop. There was nothing but searing white-hot pain and then they began to—_

Sharply, Ciel lurched up in his bed, both hands thrust out as if such frail limbs could protect him. A scream tore from his throat, but it diminished against the walls as he panted for breath. The sheets were wet and hideous shame welled up in Ciel’s chest. He was ten years old… Such childish things like wetting the bed were supposed to be long over and done with, but that nightmare… His fear had been paralyzing, the pain pushing his small body over the edge.

Ciel climbed out of bed, shivering as the cool night air pressed against his wet nightshirt, and turned on all the lights on his way to the bathroom. Maybe if all the lights were on, he would be safe from those monsters. Once safely inside the brightly-lit bathroom, he turned the hot water on and crawled into the porcelain tub. He could only sit there in the hot water, trembling, trying to will the nightmare away. He didn’t even realize he was sobbing, great broken heaving cries, until Sebastian entered the bathroom and spoke.

…

As a demon, Sebastian didn’t need to sleep, but he enjoyed the luxury occasionally. Tonight, he had merely been lying on the bed, resting contentedly, when he heard his master crying out in the throes of a nightmare. Even then, he waited to see what would become of it. Occasionally, Ciel managed to lull himself back to sleep, but tonight was not to be one of those nights. He heard the child whimpering shamefully and then a beam of light filtered beneath Sebastian’s door and did not turn off. He heard water start in the bathroom and then the sounds of hideous sobbing reached him.

Sebastian rose from his bed, not bothering to pull on his tailcoat. He made his way to Ciel’s bedroom and changed the wet sheets. Kindly, he pushed them into the washing machine and began laundering them so as to disguise Ciel’s affliction from the rest of the household. Then, hoping the boy might have pulled himself together by now and ceased crying, Sebastian made his way to the bathroom. “So many lights,” he murmured to himself, but then again, Ciel was only a child afraid of the dark and with good reason to fear.

Sebastian entered the bathroom without knocking and took in the sight that awaited him. Ciel, still wearing his nightshirt, was slumped in the tub. His skin was the same white of the porcelain and the fabric of his shirt so that he almost looked like nothing more than a mop of wet dark hair and paler scars. His legs were drawn tightly against his chest, arms wrapped around them, and if the shaking of his shoulders was any indication, he was crying terribly. 

The hot water had steamed the mirror and all the bathroom lights were burning brightly.

“Young master,” Sebastian said quietly so as not to frighten him, but Ciel jolted anyway. Water sloshed over the rim of the tub, violently, noisily.

“S-Sebastian,” the boy whispered and his eyes welled with fresh tears. “Do you think I-I’m… built for sin?”

Surprised by the question, Sebastian didn’t have a cool and collected answer for the young boy. Instead, the demon in him showed forefront and he said, “Well, you did summon a demon. You aren’t exactly God’s disciple.”

Ciel’s eyes shone with tears and he sobbed raggedly, pressing his hand over his mouth. 

All at once, Sebastian realized that had been the wrong answer and he struggled to find the correct words to smooth over his faux pas, but nothing came to him. He just stared into the child’s face, into the damaged eye forever marred with the sign of their contract, into the scars that were so visible on his heart and soul just as they were on his fragile body. 

Ciel stared right back at him, weeping quietly, his gaze unwavering. Then, he suddenly turned away and buried his face into his folded arms, body wracked with violent cries. “When will this end?” he sobbed, voice muffled and cracked. “I don’t want any more nightmares. I want to be able to touch people without seeing their faces, without feeling their hands on me, without… screaming. When will it be over? I just… want it to be… over…”

Sebastian stared at the boy’s trembling body, listened to his sobbing, and felt uncharacteristically lost. He had no idea what to do to comfort this child. Instead, he focused on just getting the boy out of the cooling water and into some fresh clothes.

Ciel let himself be dried and redressed like a puppet whose strings had been cut. He stood there, shivering, as Sebastian led him through the brightly-lit halls back to his bedroom. Though the butler was a demon, he still tucked the boy in, smoothing the blankets across his thighs and chest.

“Sebastian,” Ciel whispered, exhaustion soaking into his muscles as the fear and adrenaline left him. “Do you really think I’m built for sin?”

This time, Sebastian said, “No.”

Ciel’s eyes slipped shut and he was quiet, breathing softly. Sebastian lingered at the boy’s bedside for a long moment, looking at his sleeping face. For once, he wasn’t merely hungry with the thought of devouring the child’s soul. He felt sorrow for someone who had suffered so much and still had no solace in sight. He wished there was something he could do to soothe the boy’s fears and nightmares, but he had done his part—he had slayed the monsters that had tortured the child. That was really all he could do… wasn’t it?

X X X

Questions, comments, concerns? 


	2. A Demon's Covenant

Happy Memorial Day!

I meant this to be a one-shot, but—as usual—it got too long on me…

X X X

It was midmorning and the air was scented with roses. Butterflies flitted from petal to petal and birds were singing in the high trees as if they had never known night’s darkness. The sunlight was warm and precious on the boy’s pale papery skin. It was a beautiful day, but it didn’t feel happy—not really.

But Ciel watched Sebastian with the cat and couldn’t help the small smile that pulled the corner of his mouth. It was obvious that his demonic butler was happy in this moment. Even if Ciel was uncertain of what emotion was welling up inside his chest like too much blood. 

Was it jealousy for how gently Sebastian held and stroked the cat, burying his face into its night-dark fur? He wished someone would hold him that gently, he knew, but he also wished he would be able to accept such a tender embrace. If anyone tried to touch him, he knew he would scream, memories cascading over him and drowning him in his own spilled blood. No matter how much he wanted to be held like that, he knew that he wouldn’t be able to.

Was it hatred for the people who had taken everything from him and made him into the pathetic damaged child he was now? Did he loathe Sebastian for his obvious delight in the cat, wishing the demon was miserable like he was? Or was it just the loss of his family that made him wish for his mother’s embrace and the scent of her perfume or his father’s warm hand and strong arms? 

Or was it merely the warm sunny weather and the dispassionate way the world kept on turning without a care for his pain? 

Was he angry at his silent God for abandoning him to unspeakable torture at the hands of other humans and then the mercy of a demon? But at least Sebastian had come to save him, even if the reason was as selfish as seeking a meal. Sebastian had come to his rescue and avenged him and now, Sebastian remained at his side, coddling this cat. 

Ciel wasn’t sure how he felt about that.

The cat looked to happy, purring with pleasure, and Sebastian’s lips curved further into a delighted smile that Ciel rarely saw.

“Sebastian,” he called, but the butler didn’t answer. He was too lost in his joy with the cat cuddled in his arms. So Ciel simply watched, watched the demon’s overwhelming tenderness with the animal and wondered if—just maybe—Sebastian could show that amount of obvious care to Ciel. And so, Ciel rose to his feet and went to fetch what he had wanted from his butler—a glass of iced tea—himself so as not to disturb the demon’s happiness.

…

The nightmares didn’t return to torment Ciel for two nights after that. The relief, though, was short-lived because the nightmare that plagued him next was nearly twice as terrible as usual and the storm raging beyond the shuddering glass pane of his window only made it worse.

_Blood was falling down on the boy’s naked body, pouring down like heated rain. Even so, Ciel shuddered, his skin prickling with filth and horror. Whose blood was this? He tried to breathe through his nose so the blood wouldn’t flow into his mouth, tried to turn his head to shelter his face, but it was useless. It seemed as if the blood was pouring in from the ceiling of the cage—inescapable—as if someone was being butchered just atop Ciel’s prison._

_The blood flowed down on him endlessly and… it didn’t flow out of the cage. The cage began to fill, lapping up Ciel’s naked sides. Soon, he would drown in this blood—and he didn’t even know whose it was. He didn’t know why it felt so important to him to know whose blood it was, but even that thought was soon erased from his mind as the blood reached his chin. He strained, reaching his hands beyond the bars to plead with his captors._

_“Please,” he begged them. “I’m going to drown.”_

_They stared at him beyond the bars, grinning like devils._

_“Please,” he sobbed, choking. “I don’t want to die like this, please.”_

_“How would you like to die?” one of the cultists asked him cruelly. “Go on, tell me, boy.”_

_Blood filled Ciel’s mouth, filling his lungs and smothering him. He pressed his face between the bars, sucking in life-giving air._

_One of the cult members pushed their fingers into his mouth, gagging him, but there was no place for him to escape. Pulling his face back into the cage would mean being drowned in the blood that filled it. The fingers moved purposefully, fucking his mouth, pushing deep into his throat. Then, a cock replaced the fingers, slamming into the back of his throat._

_Ciel wanted to pull away and, for once, he could, but that would mean submerging his face within the blood again. He didn’t know which idea horrified him more—to willingly submit to having his mouth violated or drowning in some else’s blood._

_“How do you want to die?” The voice was muffled, seeping into Ciel’s mind through the blood that his head was mostly submerged in._

_Ciel tried to speak, but the cock had gagged him. After a moment, it was removed to allow him to speak. “Please,” he croaked, “Let me out.”_

_The door of the cage opened and Ciel spilled out, the river of blood gushing out after him. He coughed, spitting up blood and semen, and desperately wiped the blood from his eyes so he could see his tormentors. They grinned cruelly down at him and one man tipped his chin to gesture behind Ciel._

_“Not even the devil wants you, you sinful whore,” a woman snarled._

_“A child built for sin,” a man said coldly as if disgusted._

_Ciel’s heart pounded and he turned his head sharply to look behind him. His own corpse was lying atop the cage, chest cavity torn open and guts spilling out and blood pouring endlessly. His trusted demon was perched on the body, darkness obscuring his merciless form. Sebastian’s dark claws had dug into Ciel’s torn body, feasting on the boy’s heart and soul with a wicked smirk._

_“N-no,” Ciel whimpered, stricken._

_Sebastian stepped down from the top of the cage, his knife-heeled boots splashing in the blood. Without a care, he tossed Ciel’s half-eaten heart aside and Ciel felt it break somewhere in the shadows of the room. He scrambled backwards from his demon’s approach, terror gripping him._

_“Sebastian,” he whispered. “Please, don’t! No!”_

_But Sebastian cared nothing for the boy’s pleas. He grabbed Ciel’s wrists and ripped the boy to his feet, leering with a hiss in Ciel’s face. “What a filthy body you have,” he said silkily._

_“Sebastian, please, don’t!” Ciel begged, struggling weakly in his butler’s grasp. “Please, let me go. Please, no!”_

_Sebastian bent his face close to Ciel’s, breathing in a scent only he could smell. “Delicious, corrupted, filthy,” he purred and a long tongue snaked from his mouth to trail down Ciel’s blood-stained cheek. “I will devour your sinful body… piece by piece…”_

_Ciel trembled, tears gathering in his eyes. “Please,” he whimpered. “Please, Sebastian, please, don’t… don’t hurt me.”_

_Sebastian grinned wickedly, all sharp devouring teeth. “Why?” he hissed._

_“I-I-I—” Ciel broke off as Sebastian’s sharp nails scraped paths down his chest and back. Old wounds and scars tore open anew, bruises splitting open into worse wounds, and his blood poured. “Please, stop! That hurts!” he pleaded._

_Sebastian laughed, his voice echoing meanly on the walls. “Wasn’t that the idea?” Then, his gouging fingers cupped Ciel’s naked buttocks and dug into the brutalized flesh. He slipped one finger from each hand into Ciel’s rectum and pulled the boy’s body open like a flower._

_Ciel screamed and yet his fingers knotted against Sebastian’s chest, clinging to the demon desperately. “Please, stop, Sebastian, please… it hurts…”_

_“You’re so loose,” Sebastian whispered into Ciel’s ear. “You’ve been used beyond your worth. Why should I even bother to rape you?”_

_Ciel whimpered, tears rolling down his cheeks._

_“Why would anyone bother with your worthless body?” the demon hissed. “Who would ever wish to touch you?”_

_“Please,” Ciel whispered brokenly. “Please…”_

_“What is it?” the demon mocked Ciel’s cries. He began to thrust his fingers into Ciel’s fragile body, his nails tearing his insides into ribbons. “Do you wish to be raped by me?”_

_“Please, no… it hurts, Sebastian… stop…” the child begged, but even as he pleaded for Sebastian’s painful touch to stop, he continued to grip the butler tightly. His fingers curled desperately, unwilling to let go of the demon. “Stop…”_

_Sebastian bent down, his teeth scraping the side of Ciel’s throat painfully. “Oh? If you want it to stop so badly, why don’t you try to push me away?”_

_Ciel shuddered, hot blood and further signs of his use dripping down his thighs. “Please, stop hurting me… please, Sebastian,” he whimpered._

_The demon lifted Ciel and the boy’s leg twisted around Sebastian’s waist despite his terror. He clung to the demon even as Sebastian moved back towards the cage. Ciel glimpsed his own tattered corpse splayed across the top of the iron cage before he squeezed his eyes desperately closed._

_“Sebastian, please stop. Please, get me out of here. Don’t hurt me…”_

_“Push me away,” Sebastian snarled._

_His dark clothing melted beneath Ciel’s clinging fingers, giving way to pale flawless skin. His erection was large and thick, pressing like a skewering pole against Ciel’s inner thigh. The boy whimpered, but was unable to uncurl his limbs from the demon’s strong body. His hands and legs betrayed him, clutching the demon for dear life even as that thick shaft pressed against his ravaged body._

_“Don’t do this to me, please…” Ciel begged. “Please, don’t… don’t do this—”_

_Sebastian pushed into him sharply, tearing the brutalized ring of muscle further._

_Ciel screamed, his nails raking Sebastian’s naked back as an anchor and yet, he still clung to the demon._

_“You wanted to be raped by me, little whore,” Sebastian snarled as he slammed into Ciel’s small pliant body. “You want to be used like this, over and over by men and women. You enjoy being raped like this, don’t you, sinful slave?”_

_“No,” Ciel whimpered. “It hurts. Please, Sebastian, you’re tearing me apart.”_

_The demon smirked, driving into Ciel at a sharper crueler angle. “Sinful,” he rasped against the shell of Ciel’s ear. “Built for sin… to be used like this…”_

_Ciel sobbed, “Please, Sebastian… stop, don’t…”_

_But the demon only drove into him harder and faster, his voice growing in cruelty as his ripped into Ciel’s heart and soul. He heard the cultists laughing, cackling like crows feasting on a corpse. Sebastian thrust deeper, ripping Ciel’s body further in a torrent of blood. The boy whimpered, tears rolling unchecked down his face as the agony mounted beyond what he could bear, but he didn’t scream as he did when the cult members violated him. He buried his face deeply into Sebastian’s shoulder and clung to his butler’s naked body like a lifeline. Then, shuddering, the demon’s scalding semen filled Ciel’s ruined insides._

_Ciel prayed that whatever terrible impulse had driven Sebastian to rape him was satisfied now. He prayed that his trusted butler would save him from hell now._

_But God had never listened to Ciel’s prayers._

_Instead, Sebastian pried Ciel’s arms from around him and threw the boy back into the cage like he was throwing away something disgusting. The blood rushed in over Ciel, choking him, and he desperately threw himself at the bars of the cage. Air rushed into his lungs, but panic filled him just as the air did._

_“No, Sebastian, please!” Ciel screamed. “Please help me! Please, don’t go! Sebastian!”_

Ciel lurched up in his bed, hands desperately outstretched for help that wasn’t coming. His butler’s name still echoed against the walls of his bedchamber, howling with Ciel’s frantic scream. The vestiges of the nightmare clung like cobwebs to Ciel’s damaged heart, soul, and mind.

Thunder crashed and lightning flared brightly, momentarily illuminating the imposing figure standing at Ciel’s bedside. Panic welled in Ciel’s chest and he nearly screamed for Sebastian again except the second flash of lightning revealed Sebastian’s pale face. In fact, Sebastian was gripping one of Ciel’s outstretched hands tightly, comfortingly.

“Yes Young Master?” the butler asked gently.

Ciel panted for breath, unable to believe what he was seeing. The demon had come to him! Sebastian was here! With a ragged sob, the boy threw himself against the demon’s chest and clung to him tightly, uncaring that he had done just the same thing in his nightmare. He cried, great sobs wracking his small body and tears flowing freely down his face.

Sebastian patted his back gently but awkwardly. “Young Master?”

“Sebastian,” Ciel sobbed, his voice breaking. “You’d never… never r-rape me, would you?”

Though Sebastian had been just as unprepared for this question as he had been Ciel’s previous one—‘Do you thing I’m built for sin?’—he had a better answer regardless. “Of course not, Young Master,” he said gently and patted the boy’s trembling shoulders.

The boy continued to cling to the demon, sobbing raggedly. The storm raged beyond the glass, thunder crashing and lightning flaring. With each sudden sound, Ciel burrowed deeper into Sebastian’s chest as if the demon offered all the protection he desired. Then, without warning, Ciel leaned up and tried to kiss Sebastian, but the demon pulled sharply away. 

“What are you doing, Young Master?” he asked, firmly holding Ciel back a bit.

The boy sobbed harder. “I know you must want things from me,” he whimpered out. “If you want them, please, take them now. I’ll give everything I am to you, just please don’t… please don’t rape me!” He pulled the collar of his nightshirt open, pressing one of Sebastian’s gloved hands to the naked flesh of his throat. He closed his eyes and tilted back his head. “Please, I know that must be why you made the contract with me, but I couldn’t take it if you ever—” he sobbed harshly “—now. Anything you want from me you can have right now. Just please don’t—”

“Young Master,” Sebastian interrupted, pressing his hand over Ciel’s quivering lips. He was genuinely confused by the young human’s behavior. What did the child hope to prevent by giving his body to Sebastian in this moment? What had happened in his dream to reduce him to this crying and clinging? 

Ciel continued to cry, his mismatched eyes staring into Sebastian’s face desperately. The naked skin beneath Sebastian’s palm shivered with goose bumps and cold sweat induced from fear.

“What do you expect to gain from this?” the demon asked, eyes flashing greedy red before he calmed his urges.

Ciel didn’t answer—maybe he couldn’t. Sebastian felt the boy’s throat flash as he breathed, his pulse racing. “S-Sebastian—”

The demon hushed him, fastening the buttons Ciel had undone in his haste to offer himself. “If I were to take you now, wouldn’t it just be a breach of your trust? I am to protect you when you are most vulnerable, not take advantage of such instances.”

“But,” Ciel whispered. “Don’t you…?”

“Do you honestly want to be taken by me?” Sebastian asked.

Ciel swallowed and his eyes slid weakly away. “N-no…”

Sebastian smiled smoothly. “Then I would be raping you and isn’t that what you hope to avoid by offering your body to me?”

Ciel nodded, tears rolling down his cheeks.

The demon carefully wiped the tears away and helped Ciel get back beneath the covers. Exhausted from his nightmare, the child slumped against the pillows, his fingers tangled in the thick quilt, and his body went limp. Content that his lord would fall back asleep, Sebastian turned towards the door to leave. 

“Sebastian.” Ciel’s voice was soft, so soft that only a demon would have heard it.

He halted in the threshold. “Yes, little lord?”

“Please,” the child whispered. “Stay with me… until I fall asleep.”

Sebastian turned, hoping his frustration wasn’t displayed openly on his face. Really, humans were such difficult creatures to care for—hungry and thirsty at the worst of times, vulnerable to weather and illness. But even if his irritation had shown, that emotion was erased from his mind when a crash of thunder rocked the mansion and the boy flinched pathetically. 

Not for the first time, Sebastian felt deep pity for the child that had summoned him from the depths of despair. Ciel had lost everything precious to him—his family, his dog, his innocence, his religion, his future, his soul—in such a short period of time and there was still no sight of refuge in the future for him. He was to live only for his revenge and the moment he had it, Sebastian would feast.

But even so, Ciel was only a child of twelve. He had been brutally tortured at the hands of a cult seeking to summon a demon. He had seen other children torn apart, ravaged, fed to beasts while they still lived… He had been starved within an inch of death, denied even simple water. He had been raped over and over, his body branded with scars so that he could never forget and never move on. And the nightmares continued to make him relive what he had been through. There was no shelter, no safety, for this poor child. He had no mother to hold him, no father to protect him, not even a dog to lick his tears away.

All poor pathetic Ciel Phantomhive had at his side was a demon who was waiting with eagerness to devour him. Maybe, Sebastian realized, he had not been given the dog’s name as any sort of punishment, but as a sort of gift. The great dog had always loved and protected Ciel to the best of its abilities, fighting to the death in the attempt to protect the Phantomhive family. Maybe, Sebastian should have been proud to bear that name—but at the time, he had thought it was only the work of a childish brat trying to remind him of his place as a lowly servant.

“Sebastian,” the child whispered again. “P-please.”

And the little quiver in his voice was something no one with a heart could have denied. And Sebastian, though a demon, had something resembling a heart. So he said, “Of course, Young Master,” and moved to the child’s bedside. He sat down on the edge of the mattress and Ciel rolled to face him, timidly knotting his fingers in his butler’s shirt. He closed his eyes and Sebastian saw a few shining tears leak beneath his lids and roll down his cheeks. Softened with pity, the demon placed his hand gently atop Ciel’s head and stroked the boy’s dark hair.

The child was so frightened, so hurt, and so starved for a kind touch that he quickly fell asleep beneath Sebastian’s gentle touch. Sebastian waited a moment longer to be certain a nightmare wouldn’t torment him immediately before rising from the bed and returning to his own quarters.

X X X

Thank you so much for the reviews! (Anyone who followed me over to this site from Fanfiction and isn't sure about it, I assure you it's very safe. You give your email to keep nasty trolls and flamers at bay. So feel free to drop a review!)

Questions, comments, concerns?


	3. A Demon's Kiss

Thanks for the reviews!

X X X

A few nights passed.

Ciel woke up screaming and sweat-soaked, panting as he clutched the covers to his narrow chest. He trembled, eyes scanning the shadowed corners of his bedroom as if to assure himself he had truly been saved rather than further raped and abandoned by Sebastian, and whimpered softly as the nightmare washed over him again. 

How many times was he going to have the same torturous night terror about his trusted demon ripping his body apart and leaving him at the mercy of the cult? The nightmare kept changing, morphing into more and more brutal rapes and even harsher words and crueler abandonments. The only thing that remained consistent was the way Ciel clung to the demon even as Sebastian raped him viciously. He trusted Sebastian too much—so much that he couldn’t bear to let go even when he knew what was going to happen.

This fact troubled Ciel greatly because he couldn’t bear the innocent touches of Lizzy or the warm embrace of his Aunt Ann in his waking hours and yet he clung to Sebastian in his nightmares even as the demon violated his body and his trust.

Maybe on some small and foolish level, Ciel knew he controlled Sebastian’s every action. If he wished it, he could banish Sebastian to the furthest reaches of the world and the demon would have no choice but to obey until such a time when he would come to devour Ciel’s soul. Sebastian would never be capable of hurting Ciel—the child had ordered the demon’s utmost care and companionship when he bargained away his very soul. Their contract ran deep and unbreakable. 

With Sebastian, Ciel was safe… because he could control the demon right down to the breath he took.

Maybe that was the key to healing from what the cult had done to him. If his dreams were any indication, he trusted Sebastian too much, clinging to the demon even through the betrayal. But his nightmares were just that. They were only dreams and had no hold on Ciel’s waking hours. Sebastian had no ability to betray Ciel and maybe it was time Ciel took advantage of that.

There was a soft knock on the door and it opened slightly to reveal Sebastian. “Young Master?”

“I-I’m alright,” Ciel called to his butler. “Another nightmare.”

“Do you require anything of me?” Sebastian asked, studying the child.

Ciel worried his lip a moment and then shook his head. “No, I… I think I’ll be alright.”

“Very good,” Sebastian said. Then, with one final glance over Ciel, he closed the door softly and was gone.

Ciel slumped back against the pillows, breathing deeply to calm his racing heart and pushing his damp sweat-soaked hair off his forehead. Tomorrow night, before he went to sleep, he would ask Sebastian. If he needed to, he would order his butler’s cooperation.

Because he couldn’t live like this anymore. 

He needed to touch people. He needed to be able to embrace his aunt and kiss Lizzy’s cheek. He needed to sleep without torturous nightmares, he needed to rest. He needed to sleep through the night without waking Sebastian with his screams or wetting the bed in terror.

He needed it to be over.

And, being the child he was, the best solution he could think of was to completely immerse himself into his greatest fear. But Ciel had maturity beyond his few years and fear that prevented him from just diving foolishly in. The last thing he wanted was to imprison himself within a living nightmare or deliver himself like a lamb for slaughter. He would attempt it only with Sebastian because the demon was someone he could control completely.

“Tomorrow,” he whispered and closed his eyes, his heartbeat slowing as he thought of sanctuary. “Tomorrow.”

…

Ciel brought it up while he was soaking in the bathtub because the bathroom was so brightly-lit that it seemed like nothing could go wrong in the midst of so much light. Sebastian was scrubbing his back, quiet and apparently cheerful because the demon was humming softly to himself as he worked. The water sloshed quietly as Sebastian rinsed the boy off and was just about to step back to let him enjoy the warm water when Ciel finally spoke.

“Sebastian,” he said firmly, but his voice wavered towards the end.

“Yes, Young Master?”

“I,” he began, but the boy’s courage failed him. Instead of asking Sebastian what he intended, he instead murmured, “Does the brand look like it’s fading?”

Sebastian glanced at the heavy scar soiling the boy’s otherwise porcelain back. It had healed since Sebastian rescued the child from the cultists’ clutches and was no longer a hideous red angry burn, but it would leave a scar that would never heal—such was the nature of a brand. He told Ciel as much and gently pressed his naked fingertips to the terrible injury.

Ciel shuddered when he felt Sebastian’s bare skin against such an injured part of his body and wondered if he would be able to go through with his plans if he found the strength to spit the words out. The butler pulled his hand away and moved towards the door. “Sebastian,” Ciel said again.

“Yes, Young Master? What is it?” There was a hint of annoyance in Sebastian’s voice to be called back to the bathroom once more.

“I-I,” the boy whispered and his voice cracked, but he forged ahead through the sentence. “I want you to… I want you to…”

“To what, Young Master?” Sebastian asked, hoping that Ciel would just tell him what he wanted so the demon could continue through his nightly tasks.

“I want you to… touch me,” Ciel said shyly and cursed himself inwardly for the vague words.

In light of the sudden and strange questions Ciel had been asking his butler lately, Sebastian didn’t like where this was going. First it was ‘Do you think I’m built for sin?’ and then ‘You’d never rape me, would you?’ Sebastian didn’t like not knowing what his young master was thinking and lately he hadn’t had time to puzzle it out. Between Ciel’s nightmares and directing the servants and other menial day-to-day tasks that he could have done in a flash if permitted to use his demonic powers (which, sadly, he was not), Sebastian just didn’t have the time for this.

“What do you mean exactly, Young Master?” he asked, impatient for clarification. “I have already washed your back.”

Ciel’s face flushed and then paled, making for quite the odd sight. Then, he lifted his eyes and met Sebastian’s gaze and all the demon saw was fear, hopelessness, and determination. “I… I want you to touch me so the nightmares will end. I need to… learn how to take being touched. I need to recover from what happened to me. I just… I need this to be over, Sebastian! And you’re… the only one I trust enough to help me.” He swallowed timidly. “I need you to—to—”

“Are you offering yourself to me so I won’t rape you?” Sebastian interrupted, thinking of what had happened just a few nights ago.

Ciel shook his head, a single tear rolling down his cheek. “No, I just… My father always said that you should face what you’re afraid of and I’m so afraid of—” his little voice broke like glass “—of being touched the way they touched me. I see it in my head all the time and I still feel their hands crawling on me and the nightmares… I need to face it, but I’m so afraid and…” Ciel looked directly into Sebastian’s eyes, his gaze strangely firm. “I know you won’t hurt me. Frankly, you can’t.”

The mark of their contract blazed brightly in Ciel’s right eye, flaring with his conviction and nearly-unspoken order.

Sebastian’s lips curved into a smirk of surprise and hunger. “Well, if that is what my young master wishes, he shall have it of me because I am one hell of a butler.” And then the demon swept into his customary bow, pulling off his linen glove to see the mark on his hand burning brightly as well.

Ciel should have been afraid in that moment because not only had he sold his soul to the devil, but now he was giving his body up to the demon as well. But Ciel wasn’t afraid, even if he knew he should have been. His heart pounded softly with fear for what was to come, but he knew deep in the pit of his bargained-off soul that Sebastian would not hurt him and—for now—that kept the fear at bay.

After that was decided, Ciel didn’t spend more time soaking in the tub. He wouldn’t be able to relax now and he didn’t want to give his fear time to grow and devour him. Swiftly, Sebastian helped him out of the water, dried his pale body, and swathed Ciel in his nightshirt. Then, he told the child to wait on the bed while he fetched something.

Ciel sat on the bed timidly, as if this wasn’t his bed at all, with his hands folded in his lap. He looked out the window at the deep vast night beyond, hardly a sliver of moon hanging crookedly in the sky as if to mock the boy’s plight. His heart began to throb, battering itself against his ribs like a bird that desperately wanted to escape its cage even at the cost of its fragile wings. Ciel was just beginning to think that this might not be a good idea after all when Sebastian returned. He carried a small jar, but Ciel didn’t know what was inside it. He swallowed nervously.

“Forgive me for making you wait, Young Master,” Sebastian said and then approached the bed. His footsteps were heavy and hollow, too loud in the silence that was broken only by the pounding of Ciel’s heart.

All at once, he was inside the cage again.

_Footsteps approached Ciel’s small cage, splashing occasionally in a puddle of blood or moisture that had dripped in through the ceiling. Ciel shivered, his threadbare clothing doing little to protect him from the icy iron bars that he pressed back desperately against, and watched those feet move towards him. With each step, he felt the knot in his throat grow larger until it threatened to suffocate him. The cage door creaked open and rough hands reached in to drag him from the cage helplessly._

_Ciel couldn’t struggle, couldn’t fight. His body was too weak, too abused, too injured, and he was in too much pain to risk being beaten again just for another few seconds delaying the inevitable violation and agony to come. His tattered shirt was relieved of one of its last remaining buttons as those hands undressed him and then his worn shorts were pulled down. Naked, he was forced over their altar, bent at the waist with his bare chest pressed against the rasping stone._

_Thumbs dug into the cheeks of his buttocks, spreading them, and the cool stale air of the underground lair kissed his most intimate place. Hs shuddered, his nails scraping the stone altar in terror when he felt the bulbous head of his rapist press against his vulnerable core. Nothing would save him, nothing would prevent this, and when one finished, another would come to take its place. The violation would never end and now it began to push into him, tearing his brutalized muscles—_

“P-please, w-wait,” Ciel stammered.

The butler halted his even pace, his footsteps going silent. “Yes?” he asked and his voice filtered in through Ciel’s memory and scattered it like the petals of a flower.

Seeing that the demon did stop when he ordered it gave Ciel the courage to shake his head and say, “No, it’s nothing.” 

He gestured for Sebastian to approach again, trying to keep his breathing even so his heartbeat wouldn’t give him away. He didn’t want to have to outright order Sebastian to do this to him. The last thing he wanted was to feel like he was forcing the demon, like he was forcing Sebastian to rape him, or worse… like he was raping Sebastian. He didn’t want to wish that on anyone.

Sebastian was only a few feet from the bed. One more step would put him at Ciel’s side, but he lingered on that step, waiting for Ciel to beckon him forward. It took longer than he had expected, but Ciel finally nodded. Did the boy look… grateful for Sebastian’s patience and care?

“Young Master,” Sebastian murmured, setting the jar he carried on the nightstand.

“What is that?” Ciel couldn’t help but ask, his voice shaking slightly. Did Sebastian plan to use that jar on his body, to push it inside of him?

Sebastian hushed the boy, seeing the panic line his pale face. “It is a simple lubricant,” the demon explained.

“L-lubricant?” Ciel repeated, the idea obviously very foreign to him even if sex was not.

Sebastian unscrewed the lid and let Ciel dip a fingertip into the slickness. He had been with many partners through his long lifetime and there had been other men in Sebastian’s bed—a few enjoyed the roughness of being taken dry and hard and fast, but it was not something Sebastian would ever attempt to force on a young boy’s small body. And he would never attempt to take Ciel without proper preparation and lubricant. Even demons understood pain. There was a time and a place for pain and punishment, but the bed was not often the correct place.

“W-why?” Ciel continued, breaking Sebastian from his thoughts. “W-what’s it for?”

Sebastian left the lid off as he set the curious jar aside. “So many questions,” he murmured. “Are you looking to delay my actions with them, Young Master?”

Ciel flushed, his throat flashing as he swallowed nervously. “No, I just… I want to know what’s going to happen… to me…”

Sebastian gently cupped the boy’s face between his palms. He still wore one glove though his hand with the mark of their contract on the back of it was bare and warm against Ciel’s skin. The boy shuddered softly, his eye lids squeezing closed and then easing nervously open as if he expected Sebastian would have been replaced by a cultist from his nightmares.

“You can always stop this,” Sebastian assured the child. “You are not being forced—not by me—and no one will ever be able to force you again.”

Ciel swallowed. “Are you being forced, Sebastian?” he whispered.

The demon studied Ciel for a moment before shaking his head and saying softly, “No. The pleasures of the flesh will always be something I enjoy, regardless of the circumstances.”

Ciel laughed hoarsely. “Sometimes, I forget you’re a demon.”

Sebastian’s eyes flickered between the color of blood and rich chocolate-brown. “Right now, I intend to simple be one hell of a lover.” Before Ciel could consider those words and what they meant, Sebastian tilted the boy’s head upwards and placed a delicate kiss on his lips.

Ciel jolted, his fingers knotting in Sebastian’s overcoat as memories poured over him. He had been kissed before—but not like this. Never had such care been poured into him. 

_The kisses the cult members had forced on him had been lustful at best and terribly cruel at worst. The women liked to kiss him, their tongues sliding in, but they were always disgusted by the lingering taste of semen left in his mouth after the men used him. They never kissed him for very long—his mouth was better suited for other pleasures for them. The men were worse, distracting him with kisses to muffle his screams when they slammed into him or to bite his lips until his blood flowed._

Ciel pulled back, his breath coming raggedly, and he looked into Sebastian’s face for a long moment. The butler held his gaze, staring back without flinching or speaking, until Ciel found the ability to relax against Sebastian. He leaned in slightly, intending to kiss Sebastian again, but then his courage deserted him. Instead, Sebastian closed the space between their lips and kissed the boy with redoubled gentleness. 

The kiss was unexpectedly tender.

Ciel clung to his butler’s overcoat, his lips inexperienced and mostly trying to repeat whatever Sebastian did. Soft sounds escaped the child as he was kissed, sounds that seemed caught somewhere in the rift between pleasure, sorrow, and pain, but Ciel didn’t move to pull away again. His lips trembled softly, his breathing quick.

Sebastian allowed his eyes to open as he kissed Ciel, surprised to find the boy’s eyes trustingly closed. Kissing had never meant much to the demon. Usually, it was just a prelude to sex or feasting so he wasn’t certain why he chose to kiss Ciel. It had been a whim, simple as that, and yet the boy was melting into him as if it meant so much more.

Moving through the steps he had taken with other lovers, Sebastian opened his mouth and traced the seam of Ciel’s lips with his tongue. The boy had been so plaint and soft, willing, melting into the kiss, that it startled Sebastian when he sharply pulled away.

“No,” Ciel whispered.

“What’s wrong, Young Master?” Sebastian asked.

“No,” the boy murmured, lowering his head to hide his face. “Don’t… it’s…”

Patiently, Sebastian smoothed back Ciel’s dark hair and tilted the child’s head so he could see his face.

Tears flowed down Ciel’s pale cheeks, his eyes far-seeing. “It’s… my mouth is dirty… It’ll… taste bad because… because of what they use it for.”

Sebastian cradled Ciel’s face in his hands, the pad of his bare thumb resting at the corner of the boy’s mouth. “That happened a few months ago, Young Master.”

Ciel shook his head, breaking Sebastian’s hold. “But… I can still taste it and I don’t want you to… taste them… on me, inside me…”

Sebastian sighed softly, puzzled by the boy’s actions. “Young Master,” he muttered, “the taste is long gone.”

Ciel pressed his fingers to his mouth, shaking his head slightly.

“I never lie, do I?” Sebastian murmured.

Ciel shook his head slowly, timidly.

“You trust me, don’t you?”

He nodded.

Sebastian cupped Ciel’s face again, tugging the boy closer as he seated himself on the bed beside Ciel. His kissed him again, softer, gentler, but with the impatience of an adult. Thankfully, Ciel’s trust and fear helped him cling to Sebastian, melting into the kiss once again. Sebastian waited until he heard a little mewl of bliss escape the young boy before moving onto the next step.

The demon opened his mouth, but didn’t move to add his tongue until after Ciel had timidly followed suit. Only then did he move his tongue forward and trace the boy’s lower lip. Ciel gasped, tugging on Sebastian’s overcoat, but didn’t pull away. Nervously, his small tongue touched Sebastian’s and the demon waited a moment before taking control of the kiss and deepening it.

He felt scars inside the boy’s lips and on his tongue.

Sebastian shook his head sadly, disgusted once again with humankind. Such senseless cruelty that left scars that would never truly fade. As if it hadn’t been enough to simply brand the child, the cult had insisted on leaving so many scars all over his body and mind. Even the inside of Ciel’s mouth had been damaged by them. Suddenly, Sebastian wished they were still alive so he could simply rip them to pieces again. His growled softly, one arm pulling Ciel’s small body closer.

The boy whimpered softly, “Sebastian…”

The demon pulled back slightly and saw that Ciel’s lip was cut and bleeding slightly. He ran his tongue over his teeth to find that his rage had lengthened his fangs and he had accidentally injured the boy. “Ah,” he murmured. “My apologies, Young Master.”

Ciel fingered the injury gingerly. “It’s okay,” he murmured. “I know you didn’t do it on purpose. What were you thinking about that… made you angry?”

Sebastian pulled his remaining glove off with his teeth and pressed the ball of his thumb to Ciel’s lips. When he pressed a little insistently, the boy allowed his lips to part and Sebastian’s finger to slide inside his mouth. Ciel closed his eyes, a single tear sliding down his cheek. It was obvious he feared what Sebastian would do with the fingers inside his mouth. Would he be gagged or choked? Would those sharp black nails gouge into his tongue and lips?

But Sebastian didn’t move to hurt him in any way. In fact, he traced the scars Ciel knew existed on his mouth and tongue. How many times had been mouth been ravaged by the cult? How many scars had been carved into his skin? How many of those memories would he have to live with forever? Another tear rolled down Ciel’s pale cheek.

_“Open up, sinful little slut,” one of the women whispered against the shell of his ear. “If you don’t want it to hurt so badly, you’d better lick the shit out of this bottle.”_

_And Ciel had done so desperately, anything to cause less pain to himself, but she hadn’t cared. The glass was cold and unforgiving against his teeth, painful against the back of his throat, and it must have been cracked somewhere because it cut his lips. Even so, the woman thrust the bottle in and out of his violated mouth angrily until he couldn’t take anymore and began to scream against the glass._

_Then, she merely pulled the bloodied bottle from his damaged mouth and ran it down his torso, scraping a clear path to her destination. When she positioned the unforgiving glass against his ass, Ciel tried to reason with her, begging pitifully, but she didn’t care. She began to force it inside of him, the crack tearing against his tender skin. Tears rolled hotly down his face while she raped him further with the object._

“Senseless,” Sebastian whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to Ciel’s tear-stained cheek. “Truly senseless.”

Ciel jolted from his horrible memory, clinging to the demon tightly. 

“I shall never understand what pleasure humans gain from torturing each other,” he murmured more to himself than to Ciel. 

Ciel sobbed raggedly, clutching Sebastian’s overcoat tightly. 

Sebastian hushed him, rubbing the boy’s thin trembling back. “It’s alright,” he assured the child. “I won’t harm you. I will be your sword and your shield.”

“How stupid,” Ciel sobbed against Sebastian’s chest, “for a demon to say that to me. I was raised to believe that demons were the evil ones and that God would protect me! I remember the priest preaching that God would forgive all sins so long as we confessed. I wonder if God will forgive those people for what they did to me?!” 

Sebastian soothed the child in his arms as best he could without speaking. “It’s alright, Young Master,” he murmured, “It’s alright.”

Ciel’s tears dried as Sebastian rubbed his back. With one final pitiful sniffle, the child pried himself from Sebastian’s chest and let the demon dry his face with the sleeve of his overcoat before pulling it off and lying the dampened clothing aside. 

“Sebastian,” Ciel whispered. “Kiss me again, please.”

“As you wish, Young Master.”

And the third time the demon kissed him gently, Ciel felt no fear. There was no cascade of bad memories. There was only the taste of Sebastian’s lips and tenderness, the feeling of the devil’s arms wrapped comfortingly around his small body, and the heat of another’s closeness. Relief so potent that it brought tears to the boy’s eyes filled Ciel. He melted into the kiss of a demon with no fear or regret. There was only trust and happiness.

X X X

Questions, comments, concerns?

Leave a comment if you liked it!


	4. A Demon's Skin

I’m not sure if it’s creepy or sweet the way I keep wavering back and forth between Ciel’s terrible memories and Sebastian’s tenderness in the present. Oh well…

X X X

Sebastian guided Ciel to lie back on the bed, cushioning the boy against the many pillows. Though the butler had hoped to slide between Ciel’s thighs, the boy squeezed his legs closed and forced Sebastian to lean awkwardly over him. Even so, the demon did not complain and continued gently kissing Ciel. 

Once the boy relaxed in this new position, Sebastian let his lips rove from the boy’s mouth to his thin throat. The pulse there was hammering deliciously and Sebastian lapped at it, suckling lightly. Ciel made a soft sound of pleasure and then blushed hotly with shame, biting his lower lip to silence the sounds.

_Something deep inside Ciel was being rubbed and struck like a bell by the thick cock of his rapist, sending white-hot spikes of pleasure through him. He made a little sound of pleasure each time that place inside him was touched, alerting them to his feelings even as he tried to stifle the sounds. God knew what they would do to him if they knew something inside felt good with each thrust. What if they forced him to enjoy being raped? If that happened, something in Ciel’s soul would shatter forever._

_“Look, the shameful slut is enjoying it,” one of the men said, thrusting deeply into Ciel’s fragile body._

_Self-loathing filled the child—how could he enjoy being raped? Tears bloomed in his eyes, but the men continued despite his pleas. A small coil was winding in his belly, heating up insistently, and he whimpered softly in pleasure and agony. God, no… not this… Anything but this…_

_“He likes being raped,” another cackled. “Just look as his disgusting little erection.”_

_A hot hand wrapped around his small member, squeezing brutally tight. He cried out in pain, the pleasure slipping into the back of his mind, as rough hands pulled and stroked his tender genitals. Even his small balls were not left alone, fingernails raking into the soft thin skin until he thought they might burst from anguish. He could feel his small penis bruising beneath their hands and no pleasure was left._

_“Keep doing it,” a third hissed. “Make him come. It’ll break him!”_

_It was only pain and they weren’t patient or gentle enough to force him to orgasm. Thankfully, their cruelty made them absentminded and they forgot what they had intended to do to him. Instead, they focused on injuring—nearly mutilating—his small penis. Ciel squeezed his eyes shut, whimpering as they continued their violation of his body. At least it didn’t feel good anymore…_

“It’s alright, Young Master,” Sebastian murmured into the hollow of his throat. “I intend to pleasure you. Let me hear you. Nothing wicked will come of letting me know you like it.”

Ciel swallowed and Sebastian’s lips followed the flash of his throat as he did so. “I… that feels nice,” he forced himself to say.

Sebastian nodded, his long hair tickling Ciel’s bare throat. “Yes, Young Master,” he said kindly.

Ciel relaxed against the pillows, absorbing the feeling of Sebastian’s lips worshipping the fragile white skin between the top of his nightshirt and his chin. It felt so nice… Soon, Ciel’s hands tangled in the demon’s dark hair, clinging as if Sebastian was the only anchor for him in the storm of strange new feelings and swirling cage of memories. He moaned softly when Sebastian’s hot tongue dipped behind his earlobe, warm breath sending a shiver through Ciel’s body.

Then, Sebastian’s right hand—which had been resting on the mattress beside Ciel’s hip—moved to caress the boy’s body. At first, Ciel didn’t notice the feather-light touch on his side that trailed slowly to his hip, but when he felt Sebastian’s warm fingers dip beneath the hem of his nightshirt to touch his bare thigh beneath, Ciel jolted as if he had been touched by a live wire.

“No!” he shrieked, shoving Sebastian back with as much force as he could manage.

The butler had half-expected this though he had hoped his young charge was relaxed enough to accept the gentle touch. He allowed Ciel to push him back and sat patiently, watching as panic flowed through the child. He drew his legs tightly to his chest, wrapping his arms around them in the fetal position. Ciel’s mismatched eyes were wide, his breath coming in ragged pants, and he seemed not to see his actual surroundings. Sebastian was certain the boy thought he was trapped within the cage again, waiting to be further violated and beaten.

“Young Master,” Sebastian said softly because his voice had drawn the boy from his bouts of terror before.

Ciel slowly blinked and met Sebastian’s eyes. “Ah, Sebastian…”

“You’re alright. No one is going to hurt you,” Sebastian assured the child.

Ciel wet his lips. “I… I’m sorry. I keep… making you stop…”

Sebastian loosened his tie, hoping it disguised his annoyance with the poor boy. “It’s alright, Young Master. We have as long as you like. As I said before, no one is forcing you, especially not me.”

“T-thank you,” Ciel whispered gratefully.

He looked so pathetic and small, so broken and fearful, in that moment that Sebastian’s frustration was washed away. Really, it was hard not to pity this poor boy. If even a demon could wish for this child’s happiness and healing, how could fellow humans have put so much effort into destroying him so completely? But Sebastian knew the answer to that. 

“Maybe,” Ciel whispered after a long moment during which neither of them moved. “Maybe it would be best if we started off… with me touching you… that way I could be… in control…”

“As you wish, Young Master,” Sebastian assured him.

Ciel looked determined as he sat up on the bed and moved towards Sebastian, but his hands betrayed him. They trembling violently as he reached to help the butler undress. In fact, Sebastian had to aid the boy. Ciel’s clumsy fingers unfastened the buttons of Sebastian’s vest, slipping it off his shoulders, but he was unable to work the smaller buttons of the dress shirt beneath. Sebastian unfastened them with slow carefulness, watching Ciel’s face for a change in his determined yet frightened expression. It didn’t change even as Sebastian shrugged out of the shirt and laid it aside.

Ciel swallowed nervously, his hand shaking as he reached to touch the demon’s naked chest. Sebastian’s skin was flawless, perfectly porcelain, and chiseled with muscles like the statue of a Greek god Ciel had seen in his studies. His torso was beautiful, something Ciel wished he could have had himself when he was older… if he ever grew taller or managed to age before Sebastian devoured his soul. His fingers trembled as he traced the ridges of Sebastian’s shoulders and the planes of his sculpted chest.

The boy moved to Sebastian’s waist in a sudden rush, as if to escape the flesh he had already laid bare. Once again, Sebastian’s steady hands aided the child in unfastening his belt and tugging off his trousers. Ciel gasped softly, squeezing his eyes tightly shut, and Sebastian wondered for a moment if the human form he had chosen was too well-endowed or just incredibly wrong. But when Ciel released a slow ragged breath and opened his eyes again, Sebastian realized that it had merely been a merging of the nightmarish past and present. Ciel probably hadn’t even seen Sebastian’s body at all in that moment.

Immediately, Ciel reached for Sebastian’s erection with his trembling little hands, which was stiff and engorged despite the numerous stoppings and startings they had been through so far. Though eager, Sebastian halted the boy before he could touch.

“Don’t push yourself,” he told the child. “It can wait until you are ready.”

Ciel wet his lips nervously and then nodded gratefully. “O-okay,” he whispered.

Then—to Sebastian’s disappointment—he lifted his hands back to the demon’s chest to re-explore the naked skin there. The butler’s patience and self-control was tested as it never had been as Ciel wandered a haphazard path of timid touch from Sebastian’s chest to his waist and then over his thighs without ever reaching his straining member. Finally, breathing deeply to steady his ragged nerves, Ciel palmed the demon’s straining length. It was warm, the skin slightly sticky, and as soft as velvet. 

For a moment, Ciel pretended it wasn’t a cock pressed against his hand. He pretended it was a strange animal and that helped him wrap his fingers around it securely and begin to stroke. Then, he slowly eased himself into reality and listened to the soft sounds his butler made. It was sweet, Ciel thought, how tender Sebastian was being.

Sebastian groaned quietly, surprised that Ciel’s touch felt so good. The boy’s touch was random and timid but occasionally rough and eager, making it so Sebastian didn’t know what to expect. Each little tap coupled with a hard inexperienced pull made Sebastian’s pleasure soar and dip like waves crashing onto a beach. The sight of Ciel’s small delicate hands wrapped around his shaft was also surprisingly erotic.

“Sebastian,” Ciel whispered. “Does it… feel good?”

“Yes, Young Master,” the demon said, his voice a little hoarser than usual. “Just—” he groaned “—a little harder.”

Ciel complied despite himself because Sebastian looked almost undone, his pale perfect skin shining with sweat and his tip beading with moisture as Ciel stroked him. He curled his fingers a little tighter and stroked a little harder, quickening his pace. The demon threw his head back as his lips parted with pleasure, relishing not having to feel his own hand, and Ciel’s skin was so incredibly soft. His sharp teeth gleamed hauntingly in the light, fierce and dangerous.

Ciel’s strokes faltered when he saw those teeth, but he reminded himself that this was Sebastian—his trusted demon—and continued despite the prickling of fear at the back of his neck. He stroked harder, suddenly eager for this all to be over, and Sebastian’s hips lifted against his hands. The demon bucked wantonly, groaning loudly, and the stiff member between Ciel’s palms suddenly pulsed with a life all its own. Semen spurted from the tip, splattering Ciel’s hands and face hotly, and Sebastian lay back to catch his breath.

Ciel stared at his stained hands, his heartbeat filling his ears. He began to tremble. The smell of semen haunted him, tormented him—

“Young Master,” Sebastian said softly, interrupting the downhill spiral back into a nightmare.

Panting, Ciel met his butler’s gaze.

“You did very well,” the demon said and lifted his soiled overcoat from the floor to wipe Ciel’s hands and face with. “Are you alright? Do you wish to continue?”

As the semen was wiped away, Ciel felt a sort of peace wash over him. He was alright. Sebastian wasn’t going to force him and the moment he wished it, he could stop. He was free to decide just how far he wanted to go and he prayed that when he finished, his fear would have passed away just as it was now.

“Yes,” Ciel murmured, “Yes.”

“Will you allow me to touch you now?” Sebastian asked gently. “Or do you wish to keep touching me?”

Ciel could only nod, his eyes fixed on Sebastian’s blood-red gaze. The demon… was being so gentle with him—more gentle than Ciel had ever expected. 

“Alright,” Sebastian murmured and tenderly pushed Ciel’s dark hair back from his face. The boy leaned into the touch, softly moaning as Sebastian kissed him again. The boy melted surprisingly easy, crawling forward until he was practically nestled in Sebastian’s lap. The urge to take him then was very strong, but Sebastian controlled his urges tastefully even if he could not prevent his member from growing hard once again. Instead, he greedily suggested to the boy, “Why don’t you try taking me in your mouth? It would be a good next step.”

Ciel hesitated, clinging to Sebastian’s shoulders as he peered nervously down at the growing erection. “I… I’ll try,” Ciel murmured.

“Yes,” Sebastian said.

Ciel received one final kiss from the demon before scooting back a bit and cautiously lowering his face towards Sebastian’s crotch. He hesitated again, glancing up at the demon, and his eyes said that he expected to be forced at any moment so Sebastian was careful not to move his hands toward the child. Ciel had to do this at his own pace or else he would never heal.

“It’s alright,” Sebastian assured the boy.

Ciel nodded, carefully grasped Sebastian’s member, and leaned closer. 

The scent of semen still lingered on Sebastian’s cock, haunting the boy like a scar. It felt as if he had only just gotten that taste out of his mouth and now he was going to taste it again. All at once, the cage door slammed shut on his body and soul.

_Thirst was gnawed at Ciel’s guts. His mouth was too dry to pleasure them, his tongue like sandpaper, and his throat raw and scratchy. The semen they had poured into his mouth had only dried into a paste. He needed water, but his mouth was too dry to even beg for it. Thankfully, the cultists were cruel, but not blind or stupid._

_“He’s thirsty,” one of the women said. “When was the last time we gave him water?”_

_“Don’t remember, but I drank too much of it myself,” a man said._

_There was a cackle of mean laughter and the thought seemed to spread through the cultists like wildfire even if no one spoke it aloud._

_The cock was slammed back into his mouth and he thought his skin would crack from the dryness, but even as that thought flit through his hazed mind, warm liquid filled his mouth. For a split second, Ciel was so desperately thirsty that he didn’t even think about the source and just began to drink. Then, once the thirst abated slightly, he became aware of his surroundings and of how the laughter had risen into a loud crescendo of cruelty._

_Urine, he realized with a heart-breaking jolt. This man was urinating in his mouth! And he had been so far gone, so thirsty, that he hadn’t even noticed until that cackle of crow-like laughter roused him. Even knowing that though, his throat still swallowed, desperate to rehydrate his starved body. He couldn’t even force himself to pull away from the filth pouring into him…_

Sebastian had never been self-conscious or insecure about his naked body, but when Ciel suddenly froze, he felt an uncharacteristic surge of concern for how he looked. He reached to touch Ciel, but halted his hands inches from the boy’s clothed back. Ciel was probably thinking of the past, not of Sebastian at all. 

Instead, the demon called gently, “Young Master.”

Ciel blinked, jolting back suddenly. His timid grip tightened as it to anchor himself. “S-Sebastian,” he whimpered.

“It’s alright,” the demon soothed. 

Moving slowly to be certain Ciel understood his intentions, Sebastian reached out to touch the boy. He cupped the child’s face, thumb tracing the curve of his cheek in a gentle caress. He stroked Ciel’s hair, applying a pressure so light that it hardly existed to the back of Ciel’s neck to encourage the boy to return to his earlier actions. Ciel wet his lips, hesitated for a moment, and then timidly opened his mouth to envelope the head of Sebastian’s member. 

When the demon felt the heat of the boy’s mouth and the timid touch of his small tongue on the underside, he nearly pushed Ciel’s head down to force the child take him deeper. But the mark of their covenant blazed accusingly on the back of Sebastian’s hand and he forced the hand on the back of Ciel’s neck to slide into the boy’s silky hair. He petted Ciel’s hair with redoubled gentleness even though he wanted nothing more that to give into the urges of the flesh.

Ciel worked slowly, but his tongue was far more experienced than his hands had been. It was all Sebastian could do not to buck fiercely into the boy’s mouth. His fingers tangled in Ciel’s hair, the other hand knotting in the sheets. The boy made a soft sound, the muscles of his throat convulsing when Sebastian slid too deep, but that pulse of heat and tightness pushed Sebastian over the edge. With a groan, he pressed down on the back of Ciel’s head and his member slid into the boy’s throat.

Ciel struggled to pull back and Sebastian realized what he had done when he heard the child begin to cough raggedly. The boy was doubled over on the bed, hand pressed over his mouth, eyes wide and tragic, as he coughed painfully. 

“Young Master,” Sebastian murmured, rubbing the boy’s back as he gasped for breath. “I’m very sorry. I don’t know what came over me. My apologies. It just—”

“Felt too good?” Ciel interrupted almost accusingly. Then, his voice cracked and tears slid down his cheeks, “Is it my fault this happens to me? Do I deserve this? Is it my fault?”

Sebastian pulled the boy into his arms, cradling him gently against his naked chest. “No, Young Master,” he murmured. “It isn’t your fault, not at all.”

Ciel sobbed quietly and Sebastian brushed the tears away with the pad of his thumbs. He kissed Ciel with the utmost care, tenderly sliding his tongue into the boy’s mouth. The boy began to relax, his tears fading, until he was a puddle in Sebastian’s arms. He melted into the kiss, breathing shallowly with pleasure. Sebastian realized that Ciel enjoyed being kissed even through his panic and pain and that was something he could use to help the boy through this.

“Young Master,” Sebastian murmured. “May I touch you now? Let me pleasure you.”

Ciel nodded easily, his eyes hazy and his soft lips swollen from the tender kiss.

Sebastian allowed a smile to grace his lips as he kissed a path from Ciel’s ear down his throat to the hollows of his collarbones, pausing occasionally to suckle the soft flesh. Distracting the boy with these tender touches, Sebastian began to unbutton Ciel’s white nightshirt, sliding the halves of the fabric apart to reveal the boy’s pale chest. The bared skin prickled with goose bumps as the cool air washed over him and Ciel shuddered nervously. He reached for Sebastian’s hand as if to stop the touch.

The demon hushed him, gently guiding his trembling hands aside and letting his fingertips dance across the boy’s silky skin. His skin was soft, lightly freckled and virtually hairless. A few scars lingered, but a thick stab wound bisected Ciel’s chest—it was the injury that had pushed him to death and made him accidentally summon Sebastian. Tenderly, Sebastian pressed a kiss to each terrible injury, his tongue snaking out to lavish attention on each scar. Ciel shuddered again, his muscles curling tragically as if to hide within his own skin even though it was the least safe place for him to shelter himself.

Sebastian soothed the boy, murmuring sweet nothings and assurances of his gentleness. When the pad of Sebastian’s thumb brushed warmly over Ciel’s nipple, the boy arched like a bow and made a little sound of pleasure. Sebastian smiled and repeated his action, his fingertips lightly caressing both Ciel’s rosy nipples. His tongue rasped over them, rough like a cat’s but softer than any feather. Gently, he ran his hands down Ciel’s sides, stroking the child’s thin body almost lovingly.

“Sebastian,” the boy gasped. 

“Does it feel good, Young Master?” he asked.

Ciel tensed, his heart skipping a beat. His muscles coiled to pull away, but Sebastian hushed him. 

“I won’t hurt you,” the demon assured. “Just tell me.”

Blushing, Ciel could only nod. 

Sebastian’s smile was innocently pleased and Ciel let out a quiet breath he didn’t know he had been holding. Sebastian wasn’t going to use his pleasure against him or to hurt him worse. In fact, Sebastian seemed to want to give the boy as much pleasure as possible to distract him from his fear of intimacy. For that, Ciel was grateful. He relaxed as Sebastian kissed him again, caressing his chest and stomach gently until Ciel melted.

Sebastian cradled the boy in his arms, sliding the nightshirt off him completely. Then, he held the lightly-trembling child to his naked chest until he calmed. Once again, Sebastian moved down the boy’s chest, feathering kisses on Ciel’s hips and thighs. Teasingly, he avoided his destination, giving Ciel time to adjust to the thought of what was to come. When the boy whimpered softly, his hips lifting involuntarily to the tickle of Sebastian’s long hair and feather-light kisses, Sebastian decided it was time.

Cautiously, Sebastian wrapped his fingers around Ciel’s small penis. He was pleased to discover the boy was half-hard and at least enjoying most of their activities even if his horrible memories tormented him. The demon stroked Ciel expertly, rolling his thumb over the weeping head and squeezing softly. Ciel whimpered quietly, fingers knotting in the sheets as he writhed beneath Sebastian. He seemed torn between desiring to pull away or push deeper into his butler’s grasp.

Before he could decide to pull away, Sebastian leaned down to engulf the boy in his mouth. Ciel gasped out raggedly, his fingers tangling in Sebastian’s dark hair and tugging insistently. The demon obliged the boy’s unspoken plea and swallowed his small member deeper, licking it sweetly. Ciel felt that coil of hot bliss in the pit of his stomach for the second time in his short life, but this time he didn’t feel terror following it. There was only pleasure in the heat of Sebastian’s mouth and the slight scrape of his teeth.

“S-Sebastian,” the boy whimpered. “P-please…”

Blindly, Sebastian reached for the nightstand where he had left the jar of lubricant and dipped his fingers into it. Now would be the perfect time to insert a finger while Ciel was lost in his rising pleasure and imminent orgasm. He sucked the boy deeper, swirling his tongue expertly as his free hand roved Ciel’s pale chest to keep him from moving too much. He brought his slickened fingers to Ciel’s backside and stroked the puckered entrance there.

Ciel tensed immediately, terror cutting through his pleasure. “No!” he shrieked, trying to thrash away. “No!” 

Wildly, the child lashed out. His adrenaline gave him strength and Sebastian didn’t want to hurt or frighten the boy so he began to pull away. Frantically, Ciel kicked out with his legs and managed to catch the demon in the chest. Sebastian threw himself backwards out of range and watched the human with wide eyes. Things had been going so well and now Ciel was reduced to a naked shivering mess curled tightly in the fetal position once again.

X X X

Questions, comments, concerns?

Review!


	5. The End

Final chapter!

X X X

How many times had that part of his fragile body been violated? How many times had it been ripped and torn? How much blood had spilled from inside of him? How much semen had been poured into that once-secret place? How many times had he been taken against his will?

The horrible memories poured over the child in flashes and flickers, disjointed images that no longer made sense. 

_He was forced down on the altar, rough stone scraping his sore aching skin. His thighs were parted savagely, ankles chained, wrists lashed behind his back so he had no hope of struggle or escape. He held his breath desperately in the hopes of delaying the inevitable—as soon as he opened his mouth to breathe, a cock would be forced inside. Even knowing that though, when his body was brutally entered, his screaming gave them plenty of opportunity to ravage his mouth._

_But it wasn’t enough to simply rape him, to destroy his body from the inside out. They had to demolish his mind, shattering his self-confidence and tearing his self-worth into pieces. The child’s emotions were crippled just as badly as his fragile body—if not worse. Their words cut deep, ripping what little was left of him into shreds._

_“Worthless little whore!”_

_“What a shameful child. He was built for sin.”_

_“Suck harder, you slut.”_

_“You like that, don’t you? Take it deeper!”_

_“Swallow it all, boy.”_

_“He’s so tight…”_

_“You’d think the little whore would have loosened up by now. He’s used goods—damaged.”_

_Malicious cackling laughter. Their laughter cut deeper than even their words. He would hear that laughter until he died and hopefully it would not follow him to his grave._

_Their cruelty knew no bounds. His small body was violated by objects when they ran out of stamina. They starved him to the limits of his life, allowing only urine and semen to fill his stomach. They used him over and over again, tirelessly, until his body was unable to fight the intrusions. They kept him inside the icy cage, his muscles dissolving from disuse until standing was difficult. They beat him, whipped him, cut him, branded him… Scars would never fade from the child’s porcelain skin, constant reminders of what he had been through._

_The inside of his mouth was scarred._

_Fingers knotted in his hair—pulling painfully, tearing his scalp and ripping out the dark strands. His head was jerked forwards and back, tilted and turned at different angles. His throat was bruised and raw from the girth of thick cocks. Semen poured from the corners of his torn mouth. The child wanted to throw up, sickened by the taste that never faded._

_The inside of his body was scarred._

_His buttocks and thighs were marked with permanent handprints, fingers gouging into his thin white skin until blood was drawn. His hips ached from his legs being spread so wide, his knees scraped badly from being taken on the rough floor and altar over and over. Blood and semen stained his thighs, poured from inside him. The child’s eyes were red-rimmed and dark, empty of hope._

_His small genitals were scarred._

_Women’s bodies produced natural lubricant even under the duress of rape to protect them from further damage, but the boy’s body was not as kind to him. When the cultists raped him, his small prostate was stimulated despite the agony ripping through ever fiber of his being. If they saw that he was enjoying it, they went out of their way to inflict more pain to his small erection. Most of the time, the child was grateful for that—no matter how much it hurt._

_If not his entire body and much of his mind had been brutally shattered by the cultists._

Suddenly, it seemed insane to ever want to be touched again.

Ciel was curled into the fetal position on the neatly-made bed, his arms wrapped around his trembling body like a shelter. His eyes were wide and tragic, terror and regret filling those beautiful orbs. He rocked himself slightly, shuddering. The hideous brand on his back stood out like a dark bruise against his healed skin. The child was pathetically naked and small, the curves of his ribs and spine easily visible beneath his pale flesh.

“Young Master,” Sebastian murmured.

Ciel flinched deeper into the mattress, whimpering softly. Tears rolled down his cheeks and he whispered softly, “N-no… no more… I can’t…”

Sebastian sat down on the edge of the bed, crossing his legs to hide his erection from the boy. “Young Master,” he said again.

“No, please… my body can’t… I’ll break…”

“Young Master.” Sebastian reached to touch the child, his hand resting softly on Ciel’s dark hair, but he didn’t react to the caress at all—not even with fear.

“No,” he begged, sobbing softly. “My body will be torn into pieces. I… I can’t!”

“Ciel,” Sebastian said gently, firmly.

The use of his name seemed to draw him from this twisted illusions and memories. The boy shivered, but lifted his head to face Sebastian. His eyes glittered with tears, shining like jewels, and for once brief moment, Sebastian looked right into the windows of the child’s delicious shattered soul. His heart skipped a beat and his mouth dried abruptly. It was like suddenly discovering that your hamburger was made out of people who had been ground and fried alive—impossible to eat. 

Ciel sobbed raggedly, hiccups wracking his small body. Then, despite the glaring fact that Sebastian was a demon who had wished to devour him up until moments ago, the child threw his arms around Sebastian’s naked chest and burrowed deep into his embrace. Sebastian wrapped his arms around Ciel’s trembling body and hugged him close, soothingly rubbing the boy’s bare skin. As he cried, Ciel’s tears ran down Sebastian’s chest.

The demon hushed him. “Shh, it’s alright,” Sebastian soothed. “No one’s going to hurt you. No one’s going to hurt you again. It’s alright.”

Ciel clung to his butler, small fingers gripping with surprising strength. “Sebastian, I… I…”

“Shh,” the demon murmured, wishing his erection wasn’t so obvious. “We can stop. We don’t have to continue. I will not do anything that you do not wish for.”

“R-really?” the child whimpered, looking up into Sebastian’s face without ever loosening his grip.

Sebastian stroked his hair. “Really,” he assured the child. “I never tell lies.”

Ciel wiped his face with his hands, sniffling as he tried to gather the last reserves of his broken mind. He wanted to go through with this, to face his fears once and for all, but… “I’m afraid,” he whispered into Sebastian’s skin. “I’m so afraid.”

Sebastian rubbed the boy’s naked skin gently and pressed a soothing kiss to the top of Ciel’s head. “No one is forcing you, Ciel,” he murmured.

The boy shivered. It felt like such a long time since anyone had called him by name. “Sebastian?” he whispered.

“Yes?” the demon answered.

Ciel nodded, unable to speak those words. Instead, he asked, “Will you keep saying my name?”

“Anything you wish,” Sebastian said gently, “Ciel.”

Tenderly, he tried to lay Ciel back against the pillows to resume his worship of the boy’s damaged body, but Ciel clung to Sebastian’s shoulders. He shook his head, wrapping his arms and legs around the demon’s torso.

“No, I,” Ciel whispered, “I want to stay close like this. Please, kiss me.”

Sebastian nodded and pressed several kisses to Ciel’s neck and cheeks before finally meeting the child’s soft lips. Ciel made a quiet sound, his grip on Sebastian trembling, but he melted into the kiss just as he had earlier. When Sebastian opened his eyes to study the boy’s face while they kissed, he saw that the harsh lines of fear on Ciel’s face were softening. He kissed the child until he relaxed completely, his small shivers fading. Then, Ciel broke the kiss, shyly glancing into Sebastian’s face.

“Sebastian,” he whispered, his voice soft with pleasure, and then he blushed shamefully. 

“Don’t make that face,” Sebastian said. He placed his thumb at the corner of the boy’s mouth, shaping those lips into a small smile. “There is nothing for you to be ashamed of or fear.”

“But I—”

Sebastian kissed him again, leaving no room for further protest. He slipped his tongue into Ciel’s mouth, pleased to find the boy open without argument or whispers of the other terrible uses for his sweet mouth. When they broke to breathe, Ciel’s face was flushed, but he didn’t look away when Sebastian tilted his face upwards towards the light. 

“Beautiful,” the demon breathed.

Ciel leaned forward and hungrily kissed Sebastian again, his small fingers clutching the butler’s bare shoulders tightly. Sebastian moved further back onto the bed, adjusting his position to be able to better embrace Ciel’s small form. The child tensed suddenly, his nails carving into the demon’s shoulders, and Sebastian realized that he had uncrossed his legs and his erection was now pressing insistently against Ciel’s thigh.

“Ciel—”

The boy placed his finger to Sebastian’s lips, took a deep breath, and shifted his position. He had been sitting in Sebastian’s lap, nuzzled securely against the demon’s strong chest, but he now shifted his body to straddle Sebastian’s narrow waist. The thick erection nudged against Ciel’s belly, weeping and sticky from being ignored. Again, Ciel took a deep steadying breath before allowing himself to settle completely in Sebastian’s lap.

“Are you alright?” Sebastian asked.

Ciel nodded slowly, looking down at Sebastian’s engorged member beside his own small limp one. “Our bodies are… so different.”

Sebastian moved his hand slowly, letting Ciel watch his every move, until he gently wrapped his fingers around both their erections. Ciel’s small member pulsed in his hand, quivering like a little bird, as the heat and hardness of Sebastian’s soaked into him. The demon squeezed them flush together, giving a few soft strokes. Ciel gasped softly, his eyes fluttering closed in pleasure. Tenderly, Sebastian kissed him once again, continuing his gentle ministrations until he felt the boy grow hard. 

“Does it feel good, Ciel?”

“Y-yes,” the boy gasped. A sheen of sweat was standing out on his chest and shoulders and he trembled with pleasure in Sebastian’s arms. 

Sebastian quickened his strokes. He rolled his thumb over the weeping head of Ciel’s small erection, curled his fingers tight, and tapped a gentle rhythm on the sensitive skin until Ciel was a trembling begging mess in his lap. Though he wanted to lengthen his young lover’s pleasure, he didn’t think Ciel was ready for that kind of experience. The boy was no stranger to the mechanics of sex, but this would probably be his first true orgasm brought on by tender pleasure.

The demon pulled back slightly, wanting to look into Ciel’s face when the boy reached the peak of pleasure. What kind of face would he make? Would he cry out Sebastian’s name in delight? Would tears gather in the corners of his eyes? Or would Sebastian once again see all that haunted the child in the depths of those beautiful eyes?

Ciel shuddered, his small hands pushing weakly against Sebastian’s chest. “Don’t… No more or I’ll…”

Sebastian’s lips ghosted against the shell of Ciel’s ear. “Go ahead. Enjoy the feeling of pleasure, Ciel.”

Crying out softly, his small body convulsing in Sebastian’s embrace, the child’s orgasm rocked him. White light seemed to fill up and overwhelm the world, stealing away all the thoughts in Ciel’s mind and replacing his troubles with a wave of warmth and pleasure. He gasped, breath rattling in his lungs, and clung to Sebastian as if he was the only anchor in this storm of new feelings.

Sebastian stroked the boy’s softening length as he rode the aftershocks of his pleasure. “Did that feel good, Ciel?”

“Y-yes,” the boy whispered. “I’ve never felt anything like that…”

Sebastian pressed a kiss to Ciel’s temple. “Of course not,” he murmured. Then, more to himself than Ciel, “Those disgusting pigs that violated you would never have bothered to give you such pleasure or take care with your fragile body. Humans are so delicate, their lives are so short, and they are so…” He studied the child in his lap, spent with pleasure. “They are adorable,” Sebastian decided. “Sweet like cats.”

“Did you say something?” Ciel asked, his voice soft and dreamy.

Sebastian tucked his fingers beneath the boy’s chin and lifted his head for a deep kiss. When they broke apart, Sebastian whispered, “I can make it feel even better, Ciel. Do you trust me?”

“Better?” Ciel repeated, his eyes wide. Then, he said softly, “Yes, I… do. I trust you, Sebastian.”

“Good.” The demon smoothed back Ciel’s silken dark hair, tracing the contours of the boy’s lean face. “Remember earlier when we talked about the lubricant?”

Ciel nodded, nervousness creeping into his sated expression, but he did not yet pull away. He merely glanced down at Sebastian’s waiting erection and swallowed. “Yes,” he murmured.

Sebastian stroked his face gently, keeping Ciel’s attention and his fear at bay as he spoke. “With the lubricant, I will enter you like they did, but it won’t hurt—maybe a little bit,” Sebastian conceded. “Do you want to try it? It will be the peak of you fear. If you can face it…”

Ciel whispered, “It’ll be over.”

Sebastian nodded even though he wasn’t sure such an activity could cure the child of his nightmares and fears. But his erection was impatient to the point of pain and he was first and foremost a demon. What he wanted right now was to sink deep into Ciel’s tight heat, but he also wanted more than just the pleasures of the flesh. He wanted Ciel to feel that sex didn’t have to be violent and cruel. He wanted the boy to feel tenderness and care—he wanted to help the boy feel safe in his own body. He wanted Ciel to enjoy sex.

Ciel nodded, gripping Sebastian’s shoulders. “It… won’t hurt?”

Sebastian shook his head. “Just a little bit as your muscles adjust.”

“Okay,” Ciel said and wet his lips nervously. “Okay…”

Sebastian didn’t attempt to peel Ciel from his lap. This position was ideal for penetration and being able to hold Sebastian seemed to be soothing Ciel. Instead, he reached for the jar of lubricant and dipped his fingers in until they were perfectly slippery. 

“Ready? I’m going to touch you,” Sebastian murmured.

Ciel tensed.

“Relax,” the demon encouraged. “I won’t hurt you. Just relax…”

With visible effort, Ciel loosened his grip and sank into Sebastian’s lap, breathing raggedly as he pulled himself together.

Sebastian’s fingers were warm and surprisingly gentle on Ciel’s most abused place. The lubricant felt cool and strange on his skin, especially when the air whispered over it. Sebastian didn’t move to enter the boy’s body yet, merely stroking the puckered entrance cautiously. He listened to Ciel’s body and soul, absorbing his fear and lingering pleasure until he felt the boy relax further. Only then did he slide the tip of his finger inside.

Ciel’s muscles clenched on the intrusion and the boy rose slightly as if to escape. Sebastian allowed his touch to slide away, returning to his previous gentle caress. When Ciel relaxed again, Sebastian repeated his gentle entrance. Ciel took a deep breath, calming himself, and relaxed his muscles to allow Sebastian’s finger to push in deeper. The demon thrust his finger shallowly, curving it as he sought Ciel’s most sensitive bundle of nerves. When he touched the boy’s prostate, Ciel cried out sharply. His body arched like a bow in pleasure and he panted out something that might have been Sebastian’s name.

The demon added a second finger with surprising ease and thrust them into the boy experimentally. Ciel continued to writhe against his fingers, lost in the pleasure still coursing through his every nerve. Sebastian was disgusted to feel scars inside the boy’s most intimate place, but with the damage to the rest of his body, he wasn’t necessarily surprised. He redoubled his gentleness, pausing to gather more lubricant on his fingers.

He stretched the boy’s tight muscles gently, scissoring his fingers before adding a third. He thrust them deep and spread them within Ciel’s body. He kept waiting for Ciel to regress into his nightmarish memories, but the child was pliant and breathless in Sebastian’s arms. He clung to the demon, panting, his hips rocking in a clumsy attempt to meet the thrusts of his fingers. Sebastian smiled, pleased and decided that it might be surprisingly easy to move to the next step.

“If I enter you,” Sebastian whispered against the shell of Ciel’s ear, “I will be sure to rub against this until you feel nothing but pleasure.”

Ciel nodded weakly, his eyes glassy.

Sebastian poured the lubricant generously over his erection, rubbing until his entire length was slick and slippery. Then, he added more lubricant to Ciel’s insides. Once he entered the child’s tight sheath, it would be difficult for the demon to stop so he needed to make certain he wouldn’t have to. If he prepared the boy’s body, everything he had done up to this point should allow for smooth love-making. Content with the amount of lubricant and the spread of Ciel’s muscles, Sebastian lifted his young master gently.

Ciel gasped softly, gripping Sebastian’s shoulders to steady himself. He felt the hot head of Sebastian’s erection against his core and suddenly it felt like a massive telephone pole rather than the average-sized length of any human male. His breath came short and shallow, but Sebastian’s voice cut through the rising panic.

“You are in control, Ciel. Lower yourself down at your own pace.”

Ciel calmed himself, breathing deeply and focusing on the gentle caress of Sebastian’s wandering hands. He allowed himself to slide down, the mushroomed head pushing into the ring of muscle, but it still felt too large. The child whimpered, tears brimming in his eyes.

“It’s too big,” he sobbed. “I… I can’t!”

Sebastian hushed him, warm palms cradling Ciel’s chest. “Listen to me,” he said gently. “Take a deep breath.”

Ciel did, squeezing his eyes closed as he sank further down on Sebastian’s shaft. It was so thick, spreading him open. It was going to hurt! “I-I can’t!” Ciel gasped.

“Shh, just listen to me,” Sebastian said again and cupped Ciel’s face. The stroke of his thumbs made the boy open his eyes to meet the demon’s red orbs. “Breathe in deeply.”

Captivated, Ciel did so.

“Now, as you breathe out slowly, I want you to sink down on me. Can you do that, Ciel?”

The boy nodded slowly, calm washing through him. He breathed in deeply, closing his eyes and focusing on relaxing his muscles. Then, as he exhaled, he lowered himself down. Sebastian’s length slid deeper and then bumped against the sweet spot just inside Ciel’s entrance. The boy gasped and shivered, his body shuddering with pleasure. And, just like that, Sebastian was inside the boy’s body to the hilt. He forced himself to be still, letting the convulsing muscles adjust to the girth and length of the intrusion.

“Do you feel that, Ciel?” Sebastian whispered, pressing kisses to the boy’s neck and shoulders. “I have entered you completely.”

Ciel nodded nervously and glanced down as if to assure himself this was actually happening. When he discovered that Sebastian’s erection had indeed disappeared inside his small body, he lifted himself a little and slid back down.

Sebastian groaned, his self-control reaching its limits. The boy’s body was unbelievably tight, his healed muscles convulsing and pulsing and milking Sebastian’s erection, and unbelievably hot with a child’s high body temperature. Sebastian had lived a very long time and he had never felt anything quite like this.

“That… didn’t hurt,” Ciel whispered and there were tears in his voice even if they hadn’t yet rolled down his face. He hadn’t really believed it was possible. Maybe in his deepest darkest heart, he had even believed that Sebastian was lying so that he could have his way with Ciel’s body. And Ciel wouldn’t have stopped the demon if that was the case. He would rather submit willingly to his rapist than be taken so brutally ever again.

“I don’t tell lies,” Sebastian groaned as if reading the boy’s mind. He wrapped his arms around Ciel’s body in a crushing hug, inhaling deeply at the junction of his neck and shoulder.

“It feels good,” Ciel continued, awed. He almost hadn’t thought it was possible for such a thing to both not hurt and feel good. All he had ever felt in that place was agony, but now… He moved slightly again, rolling his narrow hips. “It feels so good.”

“Ciel,” Sebastian grunted out. “May I move?”

“Move,” Ciel repeated, the blood draining from his face. Now it would begin to hurt, he was certain of that!

“Yes,” Sebastian moaned. Then, he moved his hips in a shallow thrust that let his erection brush the length of the boy’s prostate. 

Ciel threw his head back, a hoarse cry of pleasure tearing from his mouth. Sebastian took that as a cue to continue and began a slow and shallow pace, but the boy’s body was accustomed to being raped and tortured. The gentle pace soon relaxed his muscles as his pleasure built and Sebastian began to thrust deeper, harder, and faster. Ciel gasped sweetly with each thrust, clinging to Sebastian like the child he was, pleading and whimpering.

Sebastian reached between their bodies and began to stroke Ciel’s small erection in time with his deep thrusts. Ciel cried out, sweat gleaming on his chest and shoulders. He threw his head back and Sebastian fastened his lips to the boy’s exposed throat and suckled lightly. Ciel shuddered, pleasure wracking his small body. He clumsily bucked into Sebastian’s hand, rocking his hips to meet each thrust, and he desperately returned Sebastian’s kiss.

“I’m going to—” he gasped suddenly.

Sebastian hushed him, quickening his pace and tightening his grip. “Just a few moments more, Ciel, and we’ll orgasm together.”

Ciel’s entire body trembled. His muscles tensed, pulling Sebastian in deeper. He moaned softly, tears gathering in the corners of his eyes as the pleasure skyrocketed beyond anything he could have imagined in his wildest dreams. Sebastian’s length rubbed against the nerves inside his core, bolting bright-white light filling up Ciel’s entire world.

“S-Sebastian!” 

The demon held him close as the boy’s seed splattered between his long fingers. Ciel slumped, panting raggedly against the side of his butler’s bare throat. When he pressed a soft kiss there, grateful like children were apt to be, Sebastian reached his limit. Groaning, the demon sank in as deep as he could and released his own pent-up seed and it was almost as delicious as he imagined feasting on the boy’s healed soul would be.

Sebastian held Ciel gently until the boy’s muscles began to relax as the aftershocks faded. Then, he slipped out. Whiteness and excess lubricant dripped from Ciel’s core and the boy shuddered at the familiar sensation of use, but he smiled at Sebastian when the demon pressed an apologetic kiss to his lips.

“Let me clean you up, Ciel, and then you can sleep,” Sebastian offered and bent to gather the child in his arms.

The bath was quick and easy, more like a shower crossed with a sponge bath. Ciel’s legs were limp from pleasure and Sebastian had to step into the shower to hold him. As he stroked and cleaned the boy’s naked body, Sebastian was tempted to take his young master again, but he repressed that desire. Ciel’s body was so relaxed and pliant, warm and soft, and Sebastian knew it would be easy, but… Ciel’s eyelids drooped, his lips curved into a small smile that the demon had never seen, and he just didn’t wish to ruin this moment in any way.

As Sebastian tucked Ciel back into his bed, smoothing the warm blankets over his chest and thighs, the boy asked softly, “Will you… stay with me? Just for tonight? Just… because of this?” 

Sebastian studied Ciel, taking in his expression and the scars on his body. Ciel had asked a few times before for Sebastian to spend the night with him, hoping for some comfort from his nightmares and suffering, but the demon had rebuffed his pleas. He thought it beneath him to care for this human child beyond what was demanded of him by their contract. Ciel’s expression was as thin and fragile as glass and Sebastian knew the boy remembered his harsh words.

“You don’t have to,” Ciel murmured, closing his eyes to hide the tears gathering. “I guess… you’ve done enough for me.”

Sebastian smiled, but lifted the covers and slid in beside the child. He pulled Ciel to his naked chest and Ciel snuggled gratefully against the demon. It wasn’t long before the child fell into a deep sleep, trusting a demon far more than he probably should have, but Sebastian didn’t really mind. He lay awake beside the boy, stroking the raised scar of the brand as if his touch could wash it away. Indeed, Sebastian wished he could wash all the pain from this poor boy, but… maybe he had.

X:X:X

A short week passed.

Though Angelina Durless had alerted the Midford family to Ciel’s strange behavior after her visit, they still insisted on visiting the precious boy who had been assumed dead for little more than a month. Lizzy was beside herself in her eagerness to visit her beloved cousin and fiancé. But Aunt Ann warned them not to touch him lest they bring about his fit of terrible fright and screaming. It was easy to suspect what had happened to Ciel (and they would not be far off the truth even if the truth was far worse than simple sexual abuse), but they still wished it had never happened to the sweet child.

The carriage came to a halt and the butler dressed in black came to greet them. He smiled pleasantly at them, his hair a wreck, but Frances Midford didn’t have time to forcibly neaten the butler because Lizzy was already darting up the steps of the rebuilt mansion. 

Ciel was standing at the top, not yet looking like the regal Earl he was. He still looked very much like a child in his neatly-pressed shorts and blouse with a ribbon tied around his throat. He wore an eye patch over his right eye—covering the injury he had not allowed even Angelina to examine. For a moment, he looked very frightened and Frances nearly called out for Lizzy to stop.

But Lizzy hesitated as she approached, her footsteps light and nervous as if walking on eggshells. “Ciel…?” she whispered, her fingers pressing to her mouth as tears gathered in her eyes.

Beside Frances, the black-clad butler tensed curiously, his expression unreadable. Frances almost snapped at him, almost demanded to know what had happened to her precious nephew, almost exploded with the vicious temper she was known for, but then…

Ciel’s lips curved into a smile and he opened his arms to Lizzy. The young girl sobbed openly, tears streaming down her face, and she threw her arms around his small body. She embraced him tightly, her fingers knotting in the back of his shirt as she clung to him, and Ciel closed his eyes and happily melted into her touch.

Then, the tense black-clad butler beside Frances smiled and resumed tending the carriage as if he had never looked concerned.

Frances glanced at him suspiciously, her eyes narrowing, but then Ciel called to her and she forgot all about the strange and messy man who had returned with Ciel. She rushed to her nephew’s side and enveloped him in a warm embrace. She remembered thinking that his body felt like skin and bones, but he was so warm and he was alive and his thinness could be remedied with sweets.

Ciel sank into their touches appreciatively, happily, contentedly—even returning them. Wrapped in a cocoon of warm arms, he opened his eye just long enough to meet Sebastian’s gaze and offer the demon his most grateful smile.

It was over…

Wasn’t it? 

(But Sebastian left the jar of lubricant in the boy’s nightstand, just in case.)

X X X

Please, check out my first ORIGINAL NOVEL! **The Breaking of Poisonwood by Paradise Avenger.** (Summary: People were dead. When Skye Davis bought me at a slave auction as a birthday present for his brother, I had no idea what my new life was going to be like, but I had never expected this. It all started when Venus de Luna was killed and I was to take her place, to become the new savior… Then, bad things happened and some people died. In the heart of the earth, we discovered the ancient being that Frank Davis had found and created and used to his advantage. The Poisonwood—)

Questions, comments, concerns?


End file.
